Working Through Grief

Fostering Resilience

November 15th, 2012
Posted By:

“Nothing can make up for the absence of someone whom we love,
and it would be wrong to try to find a substitute. . .
That sounds very hard at first,
but at the same time it is a great consolation.
For the gap, as long as it remains unfilled, preserves the bond between us.
It is nonsense to say that God fills the gap: he doesn’t fill it,
but on the contrary, he keeps it empty
and so helps us to keep alive our former communion with each other,
even at the cost of pain.
The dearer and richer … Read More

From A Child’s Heart

November 14th, 2012
Posted By:

I was browsing through two of my Letitia Baldrige books on manners while writing and posting last week about her recent death and came upon a very touching chapter she wrote on how a child learns to communicate a kind thought. I was immediately drawn into the chapter because in today’s world, it is a bit unusual to come across a child of any age who says “please” and “thank you” all on their own. In Baldrige’s book, “More Than Manners! Raising Today’s Kids to Have Kind Manners & Good Hearts,” she discusses the need to teach young boys and… Read More

The Adventures of A Treasured Urn

November 2nd, 2012
Posted By:

Today I am not trying to make fun of a serious situation, it’s just that being responsible for a container of a loved one’s ashes can lend itself to a lot of funny situations even if you don’t mean for it to be funny. In my case, my husband was not cremated.  I know if he had been cremated, I would have taken very good care of his ashes.  But eventually, knowing me, I’m sure some kind of accident would have happened. Having his ashes stored in an urn in the house might have started out to be a comforting… Read More

It’s Not What You Think

October 26th, 2012
Posted By:

  To show you how little I knew about loss and the grieving process, I thought that the first year after my husband’s death was going to be the hardest time that I would ever have to experience.  My thinking was something along the lines of  “If I can get the first year under my belt, then each year after that will become easier to handle.” Right? Guess what? Not. Always. True. Grief is always full of surprises and just when you think you have it under control, you don’t. The first year was so raw with emotion for me… Read More

Finding Grief Support

October 24th, 2012
Posted By:

I recently went back to the beginning of Cry Laugh Heal and read my the first post from 2010 and it brought all the crazy grieving feelings back to me: exhaustion, numbness, raw emotions, the scary future and sometimes even laughter! But it also reminded how great my support group was during that time and how it gave me the priceless gift of hope and helped me feel that life really would get better (somehow?!?!) even though my sweetheart of a husband died.  As I met with my small group twice a month, some sessions were incredibly upsetting and some… Read More

The Big 300

October 22nd, 2012
Posted By:

Today marks my 300th post. It’s a personal milestone and truly a huge deal for me.  Big thanks go out to all of my family (especially my son, Ryan, who is my biggest blog cheerleader), friends and readers out there in the internet world who read Cry, Laugh, Heal.   You give me more than you know and I read and respond to all of the great feedback I receive!  And I hope to receive lots more feedback as I continue to write about the incredibly silly, sometimes sad and mostly spontaneous events that happen to me on my new journey… Read More

A Sweet Smile

October 8th, 2012
Posted By:

  Photo By Sam Costanza When I first saw this story I thought it was about a guy driving a cab in New York City who just liked to give candy to his customers for fun. But the story is more than that. This quirky story is really about coming to terms with a loss in your life and how this man, who drives a cab in New York City, found a way to rebuild his life and make it less painful by bringing a smile to others.  It certainly is a unique way of dealing with grief. Wouldn’t you… Read More

Aren’t You Over It Yet?

October 3rd, 2012
Posted By:

I am Catholic but I often find strength and wisdom in the teachings of other religions.  We’re all here in the same boat and we’re all here to get along, so why not reach out and see what we can learn from each other? With that thought in mind, I am sharing a short insightful piece that a friend gave to me.   It is written by a rabbi and I found his thoughts to be very comforting.  I hope you do too: Getting Over It By Rabbi Earl A. Grollman My wife died fourteen months ago.  Even though I don’t… Read More

Your Inner Artist

September 28th, 2012
Posted By:

Free Your Inner Artist Without any notice, life can change direction.  Finding that you have to suddenly walk down a new path can be scary. One of the ways that I have found to deal with life’s anxieties is to do something creative.  Being creative can take you out of yourself.  Working with your hands — whether gardening, painting, writing, playing a musical instrument, crafting, sewing or cooking — allows your mind to take a rest from what is happening in your life. Doing something artistic also allows you to express your emotions and possibly bring about healing. Sometimes, things… Read More