November 12th, 2015
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Tommy At The Beach

My heart is in a vulnerable place today for as much as I try every day to go forward and rebuild my life, the 12th of November always pulls me back to the morning of when my beloved husband Tommy died.  I have found there is really no way to prepare for this anniversary.  The ying and yang of the day can make me momentarily feel as though it just happened but then in the next moment it can make me feel that it has been more than 12 years since his tragic death.

Little did I know on that morning how dramatically my life would spin completely around and take me to places I never imagined.

This continuing process of remembering, rebuilding, processing and challenging myself is one that causes me to reassess and question my priorities which can put life into a different perspective for me.  Part of surviving a loss is stepping back from the life you had with the deceased person and bravely recalling them.  I know I am lucky to have known a tremendous kind of love and I also thank my lucky stars that my husband and I had a wonderful son who is now 25 years old.

We all have heartbreaks in life yet we must work hard not to let them beat us down.  Listen to your inner voice and trust in what it is telling you.  I have loved and lost yet I continue to search for and embrace the healthy things that give me comfort.

For all of you who have lost a loved one, I extend my hand.  Let us join together to feel the power of our collective unity and our determination to stay strong and true to ourselves.  It is difficult to set your life in a new direction especially without the person you gave your heart to.  But over the years, I have come to understand that even in the midst of great pain, things can work out.

Let us help and support each other and be totally inspired today by the following insightful words of the amazing author, research professor and motivational speaker, Brene Brown:

 “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it.

Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences

that make us the most vulnerable.

Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”

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