Posts Tagged: listening

A Listening Binge

February 12th, 2014
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For the past several weeks, I have been on a listening binge and it feels healing.
There are a number of family members and friends who are going through various kinds of difficult personal situations and, in trying to be helpful, I have been listening to what they tell me they want to talk about, in particular what it feels like to be in their crisis, what they really wish they could do to solve it and how frustrating it is to have the situation go on and on.
Listening may seem as though it is a passive activity but … Read More

A Generous Heart

August 13th, 2013
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I saw this letter yesterday and it reminded me that a new school year will be starting soon.  With the beginning of a new school year, perhaps teachers and student will be dealing with conflicting emotions about losses or illnesses that happened over the summer. When a friend or an acquaintance is grieving from the loss of a loved one, it is natural to want to reach out and make them feel better.  One of the greatest gifts we can give is listening.  Even if you don’t know what to say, we can always listen; listen as the person talks… Read More

Unwanted Care

June 5th, 2013
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How do you try to take care of someone when they don’t want you to? I’m sure you must know a person you care about and perhaps even love who doesn’t want you to help them even though it is obvious that help is very much needed. You understand the frustration right? It’s the frustation of no matter how hard you try to offer various kinds of support, you never are able to do the right thing, the thing that will make them happy. This is what I know I can do: I call on the telephone, I listen, I… Read More

Moving Day

May 6th, 2013
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I received a couple of texts over the weekend from a friend who lives in another city about how he now lives in a new place. I didn’t know he had moved from his home of almost 20 years so I was surprised by his news but I also knew that there was more to the story than just a regular heave-ho move from one place to another. My friend lost his wife to cancer a number of years ago and she was a wonderful and talented person, but she also was the kind of person who kept everything.  She… Read More

Sometimes A Decision Is Made For You

November 8th, 2012
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Maybe it’s a bit of an election “hangover” or perhaps a reflection of my personal life, but lately it seems as though I have been on a decision-making bender of sorts. Has this ever happened to you?  I’m not sure if it’s true for you or not, but when it’s happening to me it feels as though I am going from one decision to the next with no breaks.  These decisions vary in importance — from stuff around the house to personal issues — but still they seem to keep coming at me with no end in sight. Just when… Read More

Compassion at 12th Street Irish Pub

October 16th, 2012
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A Bar at the Folies Bergere By Edouard Manet Besides their obvious job of making drinks, bartenders also do something even more important: a lot of listening. Many times when people go to a bar, they are looking for someone to talk to, someone who will listen to their troubles and sympathize with what has happened to them. In our fast-paced world, finding someone who will sit and absorb our words is helpful and comforting.  Listening is a powerful thing.  It’s all about the human connection. Someone is pouring out their problems to you and in the telling of the… Read More

A Dose of Kindness

October 5th, 2012
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Visiting people who are sick is one of the kindest acts we can ever practice.  Sitting and talking, holding their hand and listening seem so simple to the healthy but those things are so essential in helping the ill know that they matter, that they are not forgotten even though they are no longer able to independently move around. Bringing about a smile or laughter through a funny story is just as important as any medicine prescribed by a doctor.  Laughter, in particular, is a powerful distraction from pain and illness. One of my sisters and her husband are compassionately… Read More

Offering Hope

October 1st, 2012
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My family currently has a number of medical situations happening and this past weekend was spent checking in with various people to see what I could do to help the caregivers.  Each situation is stressful for different reasons and the caregivers are doing fantastic jobs but they can’t do it all by themselves. I think I’ve mentioned this in previous posts but I think it’s important to say it again:  listening is a gift. When others come to us with their pain or their joy, I think it is a time for us to show them respect by quietly sitting,… Read More

Julie Potter — Sibley Hospital Angel

July 1st, 2011
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I write today about a special woman named Julie Potter who played a pivotal role in putting me and many others on the path to resilience. Today is Julie’s last day at Sibley Hospital and I know that she will be missed quite a lot; especially by me!!!!!  True to her nature, Julie always downplays her valuable contributions and the vast resources she has set up at Sibley to help others. Besides her primary responsibilities at Sibley’s Senior Services department, Julie also oversees the Widowed Persons Outreach (WPO) bereavement group.  For 21 years, Julie has reached out to help people… Read More