Working Through Grief

Tax Day

April 15th, 2013
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Today is dreaded Tax Day which means that people in the United States must file individual tax returns with the Internal Revenue Service.

Not to worry for those who aren’t prepared to file your taxes today.  The IRS allows you to file an extension which gives you until October 15 to file.  Thank goodness right?  There is more time if you need it!

Taxes are confusing under even the most normal of circumstances.  According to CBS News, the U.S. tax code is more than 73,000 pages long. Just figuring out what to pay eats up an estimated 6.1 billion hours … Read More

A Heavenly Summer Wind

April 11th, 2013
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Happy Birthday Love today to a Special Person in Heaven. The Birthday Boy was an abrupt-on-the-outside, marshmellow-on-the-inside kind of a guy who was my husband and my friend for 17 years plus.  He was an old school kind of Dad to five talented and fantastic children and took a HUGE amount of pride in his work as an award-winning reporter/writer. He never forgot his New Jersey roots, having been born and raised in Red Bank, and was a die hard Giants and Yankees fan.  He loved everything about New Jersey: the infamous jokes about exits, the rumble tumble way of… Read More

Anderson Cooper & His Mom

April 8th, 2013
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I recently watched parts of  the Anderson Live! episodes that explored surviving loss and rebuilding your life in the aftermath.I found it touching and almost too private to watch Anderson Cooper and his mother talk about their personal reactions to the sudden loss of two very close loved ones from their lives.  I really wanted to know what they did to survive such shocking and tragic deaths but at the same time their thoughts were so candid that I almost wondered if they were aware that the cameras were rolling.It’s courageous and incredibly helpful for the greater good when celebrities… Read More

Seeking Support

March 28th, 2013
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Having spent almost two years going to group grief counseling sessions, I am a big believer in talking about the dicey life issues troubling you. Whether it’s grief, drug or alcohol addiction, weight issues or marriage problems, talking can help because you are taking your issues out of the dark and shining light on them for everyone to see.  You’re not hiding your issues and acting as though everything is okay and being handled well.The idea of being part of a support group can seem very intimidating. It was not an easy decision for me: in talking about my pain,… Read More

An Emotional Box

March 25th, 2013
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As I continue to slowly reorganize my freshly painted bedroom, it is amazing the things I find stored under my bed. Last week I wrote about my long put-off decision to finally paint and reorganize my bedroom following my husband’s death.  Now, as I pick and choose what I am bringing back into that room, I am dealing with some of the things that I pushed aside after his traumatic death and choose not to think about. In this instance, it is an old Estee Lauder box that once held cosmetics and perfume.  I loved the different colored berries pictured… Read More

Public Tears

March 21st, 2013
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I’ve done it in the grocery store in the applesauce aisle.  I’ve also done it while walking down 17th Street, NW and on the Metro platform at Farragut North. What have I done? Crying in public.  And you know what? When I was doing it, I could have cared less about who I ran into or what I looked like.  I was in the throes of grief and I had either heard a song that reminded me of my husband or was coming from a situation where no one acknowledged my loss or what was happening to me. When I… Read More

Wild By Cheryl Strayed

March 19th, 2013
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Tell me, what is it you plan to do With your one wild and precious life?                      ~ Mary Oliver                      “The Summer Day” From the moment I started reading the first words of the amazing New York Times bestseller, Wild, by Cheryl Strayed, I couldn’t put it down. It has truly been a long time since I have read a book written in such a direct manner; a book so full of beautiful introspection and honesty and yet at the same time so poignant in its telling of Strayed’s compelling personal experience with grief following the tragic death of her mother… Read More

An Irish Memory

March 17th, 2013
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In the spare words of poetry, I find simple elegance and peace. Poetry helps to bring me back to my center.  To take a deep breath.  To slow down and find my direction. If you are not familiar with William Butler Yeats, he was a distinguished Irish poet who was awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1923, the first Irishman so honored, and later, with others, went on to found the world famous Abbey Theatre located in Dublin. Yeats’ The Lake of Innisfree is musical in its words and when I close my eyes, I imagine I am in … Read More

Reflections of Nora Ephron’s Son

March 7th, 2013
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Nora Ephron Crying is unsettling.  Especially if you are watching one of your parents do it. My son hates it when I cry and has said that when I would cry all the time immediately after his father/my husband’s death, he would feel this mix of emotions that he didn’t want to feel and so he would walk away.  I understand it and think his reaction was perfectly normal.  He was thirteen years old and dealing with something that adults find hard to handle.  He was just trying to survive. Now, at twenty two years old, my son explains his… Read More