November 12th, 2016
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boy-tommy

My late husband, Tom O’Toole, as a young boy

 

Good Morning Friends:

So how was your week?

I’m not trying to be flip.  I am genuinely concerned.

We live in a topsy turvy world and you would have to be stationed in some unbelievably remote part of the globe not to be aware of the election results in this week’s U.S. presidential contest.  Seriously, it has been quite a freaking week and everyone I know (including myself) is still absorbing what happened.

On top of the surprising election results, my family received some sad personal news that I can’t write about and then today is the anniversary of my husband’s death.  Okay universe, I think that’s enough.  Please move on.

Year after year, for the past 13, I approach the calendar when it’s time to turn the page from October to November.  I inwardly cringe and say a prayer that I will go gracefully through this anniversary day.  I do look back and see that I have created positive change for myself but no matter how hard I try to keep myself involved with various activities on this anniversary day, at some point my mind ends up being filled with imagery and sharp feelings that are hard to shake.

I have always felt that the most powerful kind of healing is what we do for ourselves, by our own thoughts and actions, by the way we live.  Today I have to walk that walk since I believe in talking this talk.  Fellow grievers, you are not alone.  I am also with you as we honor and remember our loved ones who left us too soon.  Tell a funny story about them.  Make one of their favorite meals.  Listen to a song that brings back a fantastic memory.

Together we can tap into our healing powers and give each other the support that can be difficult to find.

Sit in a quiet place.  Breathe in.   Breathe out.  Try this a number of times.  I wonder how often I will need to tell myself today to focus on breathing and controlling my thoughts?  By the end of the day, I just might set a record for myself while trying to gain spiritual strength.

We are much, much more than our turmoil and our grief and pain and that is why I leave you with the powerful lyrics to the following inspirational song, Rise Up, written by the multi-talented singer, Audra Day:

 

Rise Up

You’re broken down and tired
Of living life on a merry go round
And you can’t find the fighter
But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out
And move mountains
We gonna walk it out
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
And I’ll rise up
High like the waves
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousands times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
When the silence isn’t quiet
And it feels like it’s getting hard to breathe
And I know you feel like dying
But I promise we’ll take the world to its feet
And move mountains
We’ll take it to its feet
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
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