The Loss of A Child

March 5th, 2013
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When I have been in support group sessions and listened as people have talked about losing a spouse, I can almost feel the unspoken emotional support developing within the group; a sense of bonding, a feeling of “having been there” in the expressed feeling or thought.  A supportive dialogue sometimes follows and I’ve heard people say after the sessions that they have felt a sense of personal progress in working through their own emotions because they heard someone else express familiar thoughts and feelings.
Being around other widows and widowers can be a blessing after you have lost a spouse.  … Read More

Steve Martin Remembers His Father

February 7th, 2013
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Comedian Steve Martin in 2011 Comedian Steve Martin is obviously an incredibly multi-talented, award-winning funny guy. To me, Steve Martin is one of those celebrities that I just accept as being the way they are as they present themselves in their work.  I don’t think of him as a little boy or as having parents.  He is who he is as he appears in the roles of his television and his film work. To the public, Steve Martin is the hysterical stand-up comedian who played the “wild and crazy guy” and many other characters on Saturday Night Live or he… Read More

Get Your S#%t Together

January 29th, 2013
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Are you one of those people who thinks that if they prepare to write their will that they are inviting tragedy to happen to them? Guess what?  It doesn’t work that way. Chanel Reynolds If you haven’t taken care of executing your will, and/or sharing bank account numbers with your spouse or partner, then you should do it today. Not to be an alarmist, but you really have no idea what is going to happen to you and you should be prepared.  Think of it as a gift that you are giving to the people that you love.  Life has… Read More

Do Not Look Away

December 23rd, 2012
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Courtesy of CNN.com     Hold a hand. give a hug.  Open your heart. We cannot not be afraid to offer comfort and empathy.  I know it’s difficult to step outside of yourself and reach out to others in pain. To find a way to comfort and empathize with someone in pain requires a certain amount of introspection; an ability to put the brakes on your own needs and try to put yourself in the other person’s place.  Compassion requires you to stop thinking about yourself and imagine what another person is feeling while dealing with a life crisis or… Read More

Widows Fighting For Their Homes

December 3rd, 2012
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Protect Your Property Every woman needs to read this New York Times story right now (see link below). Whether you are 18 or 81-years-old, single, married or widowed, every woman needs to know the financial facts about owning her own home.  Don’t think that someone is going to go out of their way to explain it to you.  Find out about home ownership for yourself in order to protect yourself and the biggest investment of your life — your home. When my husband died, both of our names were on the mortgage.  I was lucky but I could easily have… Read More

Finding Grief Support

October 24th, 2012
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I recently went back to the beginning of Cry Laugh Heal and read my the first post from 2010 and it brought all the crazy grieving feelings back to me: exhaustion, numbness, raw emotions, the scary future and sometimes even laughter! But it also reminded how great my support group was during that time and how it gave me the priceless gift of hope and helped me feel that life really would get better (somehow?!?!) even though my sweetheart of a husband died.  As I met with my small group twice a month, some sessions were incredibly upsetting and some… Read More

Why Did I Come Into This Room?

August 9th, 2012
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This morning I got in the car and put the key in the ignition when my mind started wandering back to the house, to the kitchen in particular, and I wondered, “Did I unplug the tea kettle?” It is embarrassing to admit but when I am leaving the house, there are many, many times when I cannot remember whether I turned something off.  I generally have a mental list of the same things that I need to do every day so why does this happen? I really try to prevent going through the house over and over to recheck myself,… Read More

Vice President Joe Biden’s Grief Journey

May 29th, 2012
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Vice President Joe Biden and his wife, Jill, at an event organized by Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS) Vice President Joe Biden emotionally extended a helping hand to military families last Friday by sharing how he endured the death of his wife and daughter and revealed that at that time his grief took him to a place where he understood for the first time how people can consider suicide to be a viable option. Whether you agree with Biden’s politics or not, his remarks were striking and intimate. Grief and how it feels is not a subject you expect… Read More

The Anger of Losing Someone

March 27th, 2012
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Anger is a normal part of grieving.  It is.  I know people would rather not address this part of grief but it’s there and it’s best to find a way to come to grips with it.  When a loved one dies, many people feel anger first rather than sadness because they feel they are being left behind and also feel very helpless.  Everyone says that life must go and it does but what do you do with the anger you feel? Many people try to push the anger down and ignore it because the intensity of it scares them.  That’s… Read More