Posts Tagged: bereavement

Seeking Support

March 28th, 2013
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Having spent almost two years going to group grief counseling sessions, I am a big believer in talking about the dicey life issues troubling you.
Whether it’s grief, drug or alcohol addiction, weight issues or marriage problems, talking can help because you are taking your issues out of the dark and shining light on them for everyone to see.  You’re not hiding your issues and acting as though everything is okay and being handled well.The idea of being part of a support group can seem very intimidating. It was not an easy decision for me: in talking about my pain, … Read More

Public Tears

March 21st, 2013
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I’ve done it in the grocery store in the applesauce aisle.  I’ve also done it while walking down 17th Street, NW and on the Metro platform at Farragut North. What have I done? Crying in public.  And you know what? When I was doing it, I could have cared less about who I ran into or what I looked like.  I was in the throes of grief and I had either heard a song that reminded me of my husband or was coming from a situation where no one acknowledged my loss or what was happening to me. When I… Read More

FullSet — A Hot Irish Band

March 14th, 2013
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I just discovered the infectious and energetic sounds of an Irish band called FullSet, recently named “New Group of the Year” for 2012 by the Live Ireland Music Awards. Just listening to their music makes me feel better! Music definitely has healing powers and therapists have found that music’s curative powers can alleviate pain and help not only those of us recovering from a loss but also people recovering from strokes and other medical traumas. Music unlocks differents parts of the brain depending on the music’s pitch, harmony or rhythm and provides a medium for creative expression whether your are… Read More

Reflections of Nora Ephron’s Son

March 7th, 2013
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Nora Ephron Crying is unsettling.  Especially if you are watching one of your parents do it. My son hates it when I cry and has said that when I would cry all the time immediately after his father/my husband’s death, he would feel this mix of emotions that he didn’t want to feel and so he would walk away.  I understand it and think his reaction was perfectly normal.  He was thirteen years old and dealing with something that adults find hard to handle.  He was just trying to survive. Now, at twenty two years old, my son explains his… Read More

The Loss of A Child

March 5th, 2013
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When I have been in support group sessions and listened as people have talked about losing a spouse, I can almost feel the unspoken emotional support developing within the group; a sense of bonding, a feeling of “having been there” in the expressed feeling or thought.  A supportive dialogue sometimes follows and I’ve heard people say after the sessions that they have felt a sense of personal progress in working through their own emotions because they heard someone else express familiar thoughts and feelings. Being around other widows and widowers can be a blessing after you have lost a spouse. … Read More

Lessons Learned

March 4th, 2013
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I try to clear my brain on the weekends and taking long walks or short runs usually does it for me.  I like to make an effort to wipe my mental slate clean of whatever happened last week and get rid of it so I don’t carry it into the next week. However, this weekend I am fighting a cold and the weather in Washington, DC was just too cold and windy to allow me to get out in the elements. Instead, I exercised indoors on my stationary bicycle and the only way to break the monotony of  being in… Read More

Nutritionally Yours

March 1st, 2013
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  The loss of a loved one can literally take your appetite away. You find that you can barely get out of bed and food is not appealing at all.  You feel as though you are walking through cotton candy.  All of your senses seem dulled and off.Sadly, these symptoms are considered to be pretty normal for a person grieving. I remember at the reception after my husband’s funeral I really didn’t want anything to eat.  I had a yogurt before going to the church for the funeral mass but that was about all I could handle.  People kept giving… Read More

Writing About Grief & Finding The Right Words

February 26th, 2013
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I think the hardest thing about writing is writing.                                                ~ Journalist, Author and Screenwriter Nora Ephron During Sunday night’s Academy Awards ceremony, tributes were paid to those in the film industry who passed away in the past year.  Nora Ephron was among the brilliant people in the entertainment business who sadly died last year.  She most certainly was a bright twinkling star in her own right and the producers of the show chose to display the above quote in her honor. Ephron was a keen observer of American culture and especially the stormy and romantic relationships between men and women. … Read More

Male & Female Grief Talk

February 22nd, 2013
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As a woman, I have had many conversations with men about all different kinds of subjects.  After years of experience I can tell you that if you are not talking to men about sports, sex, food or them that after a certain amount of time, their eyes will start to glaze over and their ears will tune you out. Most women instinctively know that they like to talk a lot more than men do.  I know that I really enjoy verbally taking a situation apart and talking about it and then verbally trying to put it back together again in… Read More